Friday, 11 December 2009

I name this machine.....

A bit of background: Ally (the other Scrap Lady) has a habit of saying things that absolutely floor me. Her great sense of humour could I think, be called 'ironic'. Bear that in mind as I tell you that at the then newly formed Ludgershall Crop, there was a discussion about other people's craft rooms and the decor and storage and such. Blah blah. We got around to talking about the letters and words that people alter and stick on their walls. Home. Wish. Dream. Inspire. Ally expressed her erm, frustration at the prevalence of such sentiment, and announced that if she ever had such a thing, it would have to say 'Bol***ks'. We roared with laughter. And then kinda fancied the idea very much, just for the shock value. It suits too, because at her place of work, Ally is, unluckily, surrounded by men in uniform and 'bol***ks' is the profanity of choice when things go wrong or become a little pressured. More laughter.
It was that conversation that caused me to chat up Mr Dunnit. And for Ally's birthday later in the year, we gave her the very set of letters that she'd wished for. She duly 'altered' them - by which I mean she covered them with nice paper, paint and bits and bobs, and they've adorned her desk since. With hilarious results and rarely in the right order. Because in the right order, they could of course, cause offence.
And that's why, whenever we have a crazy idea - like my recent need for heart shapes, or the frames for the 2 Scrap Ladies event or the bases for the next 2 Scrap Ladies event, or the letters for particular words..we ask Mr Dunnit if it's something that could be done on the Bol***ks Machine. I dunno about you, but I've had a lot of fun thinking about the official factory process for such a job - an order form - for a load of bol....., quality control - this job is bol...... . Yep. You get it. Even at this age, over-use of the odd word makes me giggle like a teenager with a smutty joke.
So to compensate for that, here at last, is a non Christmas card. Now that makes me smile. Although, after yesterday's moaning, and today's shopping trip, I'm feeling slightly less out of sorts!
Have a super weekend...sparkles will adorn this house by the end of it. Well, that's the plan.

14 comments:

CoventryAnn said...

Both me and Mr C nearly fell off our chairs laughing at your comments!!! I think the B word would be fab to put up in my teenagers bedroom, as that't all she talks! Do you think it would make a suitable 18th birthday present :D

Linda Elbourne said...

I am loving the non Christmas card. As for the B**ll**ks machine ... now I geddit!!!
Christmas sparklies should be adorning my house by this time tomorrow ... well hopefully ... as I have five Crafty friends coming round on Sunday ... for our annual Christmas knees up and it won't be very Christmassy without them now will it ... and purlease put that Barbie down ... I promise I have learned my lesson :0)

Angie said...

Words are funny things ...I was trying not to exclaim in front of a young visitor and the word Bum came out rather than Boll***s. Well ...he roared with laughter and giggled for the next 2 hours .... adding 'she said bum' every so often !!!!... maybe I should have just said B******s. lol
Yes CA ...a perfect 18th pressy for your DD

Helen said...

What a load of Spherical Objects !!!!

I have sat at my computer and rolled with laughter - now I need a set of letters too!!!

I am going to chat up the technician at work - ask him if he'll make me a set on B*****ks for my desk as watch his lovely chubby face go pink!!!!!

I have had a long indulge looking at all your lovely ideas ... and I love the hearts and chocolate bars .... can I just ask what the full saying is on the tag as the ribbon is hiding the first word .... I guess it is "All"

I am off shopping in a bit - and shall be buying a large quantity of choc bars for last minute pressies

Thanks for firing me up again .... my festive creativeness was wanning a little

hELEN XXXXX

Ruthie said...

This post was just a load of Bol***ks.....L*L x

Wipso said...

I can see many uses for this selection of letters.....Slob. Lob. Book. Block. Lock. Loo. Look. Looks. Blocks. Books. Sock.....to name but a few :-) Thanks for the giggle.
A x

Ann said...

Couldn't stop laughing Julia!
We've a large sign on the wall at work that says 'By Order of HM Government: Keep Calm And Carry On' and another, more accurate one, that says 'Chaos, Panic, Disorder'!
I'd love a set of those letters to play with!

Lyn said...

I LURVE that word (although, in certain company, I replace it for "MONARCHS") Even better, when feeling the need, I have been known to use "rollicking bo***cks" - it just rolls of the tongue with a great sense of satisfaction...!

Anonymous said...

You realise you've started a trend in Letters for craft rooms and other places.
You'll have to get those order forms started!!!
LM

Pam said...

What can i say!!! Pam x

Jay said...

I have a set of boll**ks, still undecorated. Thanks Ann for the tips on how to display the letters when the in-laws visit.

Carmen said...

Oh dear! Tears rolling down my face here! Please, on behalf of us all, please beg Scrap Lady Ally to show us her b*ll*cks :D :D :D

allyf said...

My B*$$*cks and I are honoured to be immortalised in your blog.
And yes Carmen I shall endeavour to flash them over on my blog this weekend.
:-)

Dori Melton said...

Hi Julia,
I am your sissy's American friend, Dori. She told me to stop by your blog. I just had to comment that I loved this post! and I love that word! I plan to incorporate it into my repertoire when I am having technical difficulties. I think Stephanie will crack up.