Monday 16 June 2014

Speak in Hemispheres

If you live in the Northern hemisphere, please cast your mind back...say, to mid April.  Early mornings were just - just- becoming discernibly lighter and in my neck of the woods, we were just -just-  starting to mention the pleasure of hearing the Dawn Chorus.  The wonder of Nature making the birdies happy to see in each new day that little by little was lighter, warmer and helpful to them for the raising of the sweet little ones. I should add that here in Southern England, this bucolic scene was often punctured by the sound of pouring rain. well, it would be wouldn't it, it was Spring.
Now roll forward a little to the end of May, when Spring really is required to turn into June and therefore Summer.  Hmm, by now, I'm slightly (terribly) annoyed by the birds at 4am, and even more annoyed at the rain, maybe not so persistent, but still too regular for my summer liking. 

So, in my characteristically calm and quiet way, I start to long for our break in the sun.  Where mornings are so quiet that you could sleep through them and our European neighbours are so polite that they don't mention the time of day when we finally stagger onto the patio to inspect the day.

Ah. Well, there's a problem with that. See this monumental palm?  

Planted ten years ago, the weediest in the street and the source of many poor taste jokes from drunken patio parties. Yeah, turns out that it's the noisiest tree EVER. Really. It's not an alarm clock, it isn't a disguised music speaker.  It is a real palm tree. The spikey leaf things seem to rub together and creak. And the sound they make is of....POURING rain.
And there are long hangy down seedy bits that eventually the gardens maintenance guys will cut down.  Covered in pollen enjoying Spanish bees.  Great for everyone, no doubt.  Also no doubt, they are the NOISIEST little hummers you have ever heard.
I've had my share of holidays that include repetitions of 'Una Paloma Blanca' from the hotel bar until four in the morning, I wear ear defenders when I'm erm, being helpful in the workshop...I know what real noise is.  I just didn't expect to be persued by the sound of rain. Is it my age, global warming, nature...all of the above? Do I need to permanently change hemispheres? I may give it serious consideration.  So another note for my poor Executor: absolutely under no circumstances will music at my funeral include or consist of anything that could be misconstrued as a rain maker. I will not have my guests dancing to the sound of the rain!  


Helen said...

Oh dear, Julia!! You really aren't having much luck are you? I've never heard the noise the palms make but I am crossing it off my list for anything I'd plant right now! Hope you're on your way (or home) home now so you can rest and be woken early by the dawn chorus......oh!!

Sue said...

So you had a fab holiday, except for the Raining Palm and hospital stay:)

Hope the birds round your neck of the woods sing a little quieter for you and the rain stays away:)

misteejay said...

Not the best of holidays this time, huh?
Hope you are taking things easy and are recovering nicely from the op.
Toni xx

okienurse said...

Sad days when you don't feel good and everything is a pain in the patootie! I wish you could send the rain this way and I could send some warm sun to the UK and we would both be happier. Hope you are recovering rapidly. Not good having surgery and feeling bad! After my gallbladder issues no sausages, coffee, tea etc tasted good. Chocolate and ice cream were my friends!

MaggieC (Silvercrafter) said...

Your sense of humour has not deserted you through your mishaps and suffering. Glad you are back safe and sound. xxx Maggie

Ohhh Snap said...

I knew corn made noise, especially a large field of it, but I had no idea palm trees did Interestingly enough (at least to me lol) they are both very large monocotyledonous plants (like giant grasses). You've certainly had an interesting week or so.

Aileen said...

Just count your blessings. You could live in country area in Australia where we are blessed with Bell Birds that 'ting' all day and Cicardas that make a noise that moves in waves through the trees all day every day in the summer. Now I need to see if I can hear those 4 palms outside our bedroom windows....... Its funny what we get use to hey! Hope you are feeling better, looking forward to more post.

pearshapedcrafting said...

Singing 'Rain, rain go away!" No? I also guess that you won't be wanting the 'Sounds of the Rainforest' cd?
Try to rest, home soon!!!! Chrisx
Blogger ate my earlier comment - again!

Jan s/ crafty scorpio said...

Our neighbour also planted a tiny one ten years ago, this year they cut it down as it grew higher than their villa and the noise also drove us mad hearing it rub against the walls, strangely now it's gone it looks quite bare when we open our blinds.
Hope you are enjoying waking up to wall to wall sunshine while you recuperate
Jan x

KatzElbows said...

Sorry, Julia, but no pity from me. You're in the sun with a noisy tree. I'm in Manchester with a noisy neighbour.

Love Rachel, the heartless one

Eliza said...

I fully know that noise and I hate it seriously, if I could get a chainsaw and chop the bloody things down I would. Yoda now he doesn't know that sound and wouldn't really care as long as he is getting cuddles and is warm. LOL

Hugs Eliza & Yoda

Mrs.D said...

Poor Julia, not much fun feeling rough and if you can't get the sleep you need you won't recover as quickly as you should.
BTW, in UK if you are admitted to hospital with gall bladder problems you would have been sent home, told to avoid fat and you would be put on a 6 to 9 month waiting list. Been there, done that,
Shame it spoiled your holiday though.

Mrs.D said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Mrs.D said...

Ok, why did my comment for your Friday post vanish into oblivion and today's post duplicate itself.
Perplexed Chris

glitterandglue said...

Hello Julia. Sorry your holiday went horribly wrong - but so glad you have had such great treatment. Enjoy the enforced rest, even with the sounds!! Can't complain myself, as the birds woke me in good time to be out in the garden for 8am - can't cope in the sun, you see, feel very ill - so had to get out there before the clouds were blown away and everything became too hot. Glad to hear you are on the mend.

Krisha said...

Yes, Palm trees can be noisy buggers. I have removed 4 of them from my yard, that I so stupidly planted about 10 years ago. Not only are they noisy, but messy too. I'll never plant an other one.

Glad to hear your feeling well enough to be cranky.......LOL
Stick with the "rest" prescription! You'll want some of it back one of these days.

Neet said...

Oh heck - just remember that when yu get back home it might be the sound of rain that annoys you. Enjoy the pal whilst you can.
Oh - and get some rest.
Hugs, Neet xx

Nan G said...

LOL ah yes our intrepid palm trees. ;) Noisy buggers aren't they?! I see/read you haven't lost your sense of humor with the surgery. Do hope you're on the mend. Warm FL hugs (I removed the palm tree!)

Felix the Crafty Cat said...

Hi Julia don't know where you are now but hope you have a comfortable flight home. The european hospitals do seem to get on with making you better, they don't seem to hang about like they can do in this country so look on the bright side.
Get well soon, Angela x

HeARTworks said...

Julia, you can write about anything and make it funny!!!! You can't transfer here to the Philippines- you'll be bothered by the sound pouring rain much too often!!! I don't think ear plugs will help, tee hee!!!! patsy

Monica said...

At least you've been there done that. Trouble with things going wrong on a vacations is you always remember that vacation more than all the perfect ones. Hope recuperating and feeling improvement daily is there each day. Lots of huggy stuff and positive vibes to speed the days along.
Any errors in this message are a result of long nails, installed before i went on vacation and now catching in PC keys.
As ever

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