Monday, 7 July 2014

It's All About Me....

Although y'all know a lot about me because of this blog, there's still a lot you don't know, obviously.  And even on Facebook I haven't filled in a huge amount of detail on my profile. Like the fact that today is my birthday.  This isn't an advert, but it's a sudden and big number birthday, and rather unusually, I have something to say.


You do finally get to that age don't you, where you know yourself.  For me it was certainly through my thirties.  And then in my forties, I started to realise how empowering it was to have a first world life and all the rights and privileges that come with it.  And as my forties ended, so I'm in the bit where I'm more interested in the people in my life and the happiness they bring me.  I'm old enough to accept that there are people who don't like me, and I no longer work to bring them around.  No time.  Don't feel the need.  Unlike thirty years ago.  I'm old enough to know that I make snap judgements, and now wise enough to accept that these are often wrong..and I've learned the art of graciously admitting that.  



I am intimate with my faults (and there are many) and because I can recognise them, I strive to make sure they don't surface.  I am forthright, but I hope I'm at the least a bit tactful about it.  I'm hopeless at staying in touch and I hate that.  I had relatives here over the weekend and I realised that I'm more like my maternal Aunt than I thought - she and I share this birthday, perhaps there's more to it than I thought!
I'm all or nothing: sad or happy, quiet or noisy, grumpy or happy.  Black and white suits me very well in terms of understanding and I'm tolerant.  But not entirely patient.  And although I like to think you could teach me some new stuff, and that I'm open to learning, I also know that I'll never read a manual before turning something on and expecting to be able to use it, and I work better to a routine. I also know enough about myself to know that as much as I like to think that I can, I'm probably not going to change much.  
So now, onwards and forwards. I may be sentimental but I'm not a backwards gazer, I enjoy the memories and am thankful for my past but don't spend any time trying to recreate it or talking about it.  And generally, I have no regrets.  Except that I didn't teach my daughter to have an obsession about tidying up.  But then I couldn't have could I?
So if you're approaching any sort of big birthday....take my advice. Surround yourself with the people you love having in your life and make friends with yourself.  When you've done that, there's a lot less to be serious about.

60 comments:

Kathyk said...

Happy Birthday - hope you have a wonderful day.

What a lovely post, I passed that particular milestone some years ago but I also recognise much of what you are revealing in it. Isn't wisdom a great thing - I'm still learning though and I bet you continue to too!

All the best

Kathyk

Yours Artfully said...

Wishing you the happiest of Birthdays Julia, filled with tons of gifts, many of your loved ones and lots and lots of cake.

Lin

Annie said...

Such a lovely post Julia. It's good to be happy in your skin isn't it ? :-)
Have a wonderful HUGE birthday :-) it's such a big number but I do have to say I got there a while back and I'm now in the mode of feet off the pedals and wheeeeeeee enjoying the ride :-)
Hugs,
Annie x

Michelle Reed said...

Wishing you a very happy birthday Julia! I just celebrated my 45th a couple of weeks ago and like you I have realized that I'm very comfortable in my own skin.
You are a wise and funny woman and deserve all the blessings your life has given you.
Hugs,
Michelle

CraftygasheadZo said...

Happy birthday! Hope you have a fabulous day. What you say is so true, I'm 40 next year and have realised during my thirties exactly the same sentiments that you talk of. Zoe now is very different and far more confident of who I am than ten years ago. Take care lovely. Zo xx

Debbie Rock said...

Well my dear Julia you have me blubbering away here! What a wonderful, wonderful post and thank you SO much for such openness and honesty ... love just about everything you have said there and I had already sensed that you are one of life's special people just through knowing you through WOYWW, then knew I was right when I met you at Burbage and now have absolutely no doubts whatsoever. You are a very special lady and I am blessed to have you in my life. Enjoy your Big O birthday and celebrate!!!! Love Debbie xXx

Artfully challenged said...

Thank you for such a thoughtful post Julia,it is all so true. We spend so much time worrying about what others think of us and so little time on the people who do matter including ourselves.

Happy birthday :)

Hugs
Donna xx

Artyjen said...

Wishing you a very special 50th birthday....your thoughts are always inspiring.
xoxo Sioux

Ohhh Snap said...

Many happy returns of the day and a wish for a very happy birthday! And to paraphrase Hagrid, "Not every day yourself turns 50" : D. I see you are very on trend with the photo accessories (from Wednesday's work?).

tocovya said...

Have a very happy birthday, I recognise much of what you say especially the snap decision bit, hopefully in 2yr when I hit 50 I will learn to live with them. At the minute some of them are giving me PTSS!!

Belinda Basson said...

Well, here are my warm wishes all the way from across the sea! True to form you tell us at the 11th hour! Now we could have sent you cards and gifts and the like, but then I know you don't like a fuss...but fuss we will on Wednesday! Some how a big digit deserves some fussing. Enjoy it, have a whole week of it and revel in it!

fairy thoughts said...

All so true even though I am no where near that age ( um read well passed) such an honest thoughtful post. Happy birthday you lovely crazy lady ..... I did know BTW .... The card is in the post
Janet

Lunch Lady Jan said...

From one old Bag to another.....long may we continue to snigger over daft things!
Happy Birthday :-)
Jan xxxx

Shaz Brooks said...

Happy Birthday Julia,lots of interesting stuff here. and all very true. As you say, sooner or later we realise that not everyone will like us as we are, you just have to let it go. You can't be yourself, AND all things to all people. And we love you as yourself!Enormous birthday hugs from us both, xxx

jill said...

Wishing you a very Happy 50th Birthday , Hope your having a lovely day x from Jill

Laura (Bookworm) said...

Happy Birthday, Julia! I'm only a few years behind you (47 in Sept.) Hope your family made a big fuss and spoiled you rotten, as you deserve. :-)

Sandra said...

Wishing you a very very happy birthday. It's funny my 50th is in September and oh your words really made me smile .... It's funny how a number makes you evaluate your life. Enjoy the celebrations.

Whimcees said...

Hello!

A very HAPPY, HAPPY BIRTHDAY! Wishing you a most wonderful day!

Hugs,

Barbara Diane

Krisha said...

Happy Birthday dear Julia.
(love the costume.....LOL)

Nan G said...

Happy Birthday dear Julia!! We love ya just as you are...mustache and all! :) :) LOL

Chrysalis said...

Are you my long-lost, baby sister, Julia?!?!? Have a great week, Chris xx

Moi said...

Julia could see and understand a lot of what you said. You are truly a special lady, I have only ever known you to be bright and bubbly.

Darnell J Knauss said...

Very well said and great advice, Miss Julia!! A very thoughtful retrospective of where you are. I just arrived at the milestone of 65 and I say amen to what you said, and even more so! It really is too bad our sage wisdom arrives to us in our, ahem, seasoned years!!

BTW, you forgot to talk about a lot your very positive attritubes! I'll just mention the one I find most important as we march through the years: your sense of humor and your zest for fun!! Don't ever change!! Happy Birthday to you and many, many more! Mwah! Darnell

Sue said...

Happy Birthday.

Helen said...

So glad you had a lovely day and enjoyed time at the weekend with family to celebrate! Glad to see too that despite your interrupted holiday you caught some rays!! Nice tan....
Happy Happy Birthday and many more of them to all of us.. my next "big one" starts with a 6... eek!! But I will embrace your philosophy! See you soon, I hope. xxx

MaggieC said...

Happy Birthday, Julia. Just be thankful you did not teach your daughter the "obsession about tidying up". It can be very wearing. My daughter did not learn it from me but from her father and I have had to get very tough with her over this last year and a half. She is now so obsessed with tidying up that she is trying to tidy me when I am not ready. I have had to learn the art of directing her away from treasured corners of chaos for my own sanity. Anyway I am sending you a virtual glass of wine to celebrate (the real thing might not be too good for you yet). Take care of yourself. xx Maggie

pearshapedcrafting said...

Happy Birthday! Now I get what was going on with the moustaches etc!!! Glad that you are you! I've found that despite a few minor issues, life just keeps getting better the older we get! Hugs, Chrisx

Cardarian said...

Happy birthday queen Julia! Stay healthy and happy and thank you for the lovely post, many of us can relate to it. Lots of love and hugs Cardarian

Lynda Beazley said...

Happy Birthday Julia! You are so right about all that stuff. I need to learn to abide by your very wise words! Have a good one xx
Lynda B

Sandy Leigh said...

Well said! We have to love ourselves first, just the way we are, and then we can love everyone else. And more than that, being in our fifties, I think we have to celebrate who we are, at least a bit. I hope your birthday has been fabulous! Hugs!

misteejay said...

Hope you have had a wonderful birthday Julia.

Many Happy Returns of the day.

Toni xx

Hammers said...

Happy Birthday Julia!! Lovely post. I think I took your advice as I turned 40 last year and realised what was important...my posse - which consists of family and friends and never people who just can't get on board with who I am. Big love to you, you make me smile every week and you delivered me a really great remote friend, who I hope will turn into an in the flesh one someday. Cx

Kate said...

Happy Birthday - you don't look a day over 49!

~Kate~

Chloe's Nan said...

Hear, hear Julia! Hope you had a wonderful day.
Best wishes
Gail x

Jan S said...

Happy birthday Julia from sunny Spain.
Have a lovely day and I must say you are looking very well, hope you are feeling much better,
Jan x

Diane Baker-Williams said...

Beautifully written post and so wise! I wish I had learned some of these same things earlier in my life. Thank you for sharing your wisdom and happy birthday!

Carmen said...

I hope you had an amazing day Julia - happy belated birthday :)

I'm getting there with making friends with myself more there than I've ever been ;) Love this post!

Bleubeard and Elizabeth said...

Happy belated birthday. Sorry I missed it. But, since it was a milestone year, I read eagerly as to what you had to say.

It's probably NOT entirely genetics, although I AM half British, but I can truly relate to much of what you offered. I'm often all or nothing, too, but I always try to be kind to others, whether they deserve it or not.

Again, I hope your birthday was great, and you had a world class time of it, since much of the world celebrates with you each Wednesday.

Cathy L. Calamas said...

Happy Belated Birthday!! I had that big one myself a few years back and it was freeing. I love my fifties! Great advice, too.

scrappystickyinkymess said...

Happy Birthday!

What a great post - you just have a way with words. No big birthdays expected here (well, not for a few more years anyway :)) but I'll take your advice anyway

Cheers, m'dear

MA

Mrs.D said...

Well a little bit late Julia, but Happy Birthday for Monday. And don't worry, 50 is nothing, if you convert it from Fahrenheit to Centigrade, you are only 10 years old!!! :)
Bless you for all you do.
Chris

Eliza said...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU JULIA

I hope you have had a wonderful day. I am with you with everything you said, black, white and no regrets and nothing but giggles you forgot that bit.

Life is about living and if people don't like you then they can move on.

Hugs Eliza & Yoda

Neet said...

Wow, those are real words of wisdom and I need to read them over and over - make them my mantra. Well done Julia, thanks so much for this post and ... Happy Belated Birthday Wishes.
Hugs, Neet xx

BJ said...

So you have joined the gang I did back in February. Hope you've had a good day. BJ

JoZart said...

Hippy Burpday Julia! It's quite apparent that you've made it a milestone and not a millstone. Loved reading your honest self crit and I can relate to almost all of it.
Mine was bigger than your's, ner, ner! and if 70 (that's me) is the new 50 what does that make you.... 21 again methinks!
Here's wishing you everything good that you can have......love, luck, health, and enough wealth to make you happy.
Jo
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Save you counting, yes! there are 50
x

Paula Gale said...

Julia

You are wonderful - and I really got to know that before my forties lol... I was still just 38 when I first came across your blog - i'd been blogging 2 days - it was all new to me, but I landed on your blog and I just loved to read your posts - they made me laugh and I agreed with almost everything you said/say!! You were one of the first people to support me through those unsure times - I think I didn't even know about my illness when I first came along to your blog - then you were my second follower... anyway, it's been a pleasure so far - I love your wisdom and your take on life and the word around us - you put a smile on my face - perhaps even when you don't mean to. You deserve one heck of a fabulous birthday, and double deserving of a big number birthday that is full of love and admiration for you... Happy Happy Birthday GAL!!!

Paula x x x x

Robyn said...

I wish you a happy Birthday
A joyous and celebrated Birthday
To my Desker Friend Julia,
May she have a long long life!!!!!

Wishing you a year of blessings and being exactly who you are!

Anne said...

Happy Birthday !!!! Wise words in your post. x

Angela Radford said...

Happy belated birthday. You certainly look on the photo as though you were very happy.
Long may it continue.
Happy crafting, Angela x

Create With Joy said...

Happy Birthday, dear Julia!
I'm so glad we live in an age where we can connect and be friends even though we live worlds apart! :-)

RosA said...

A very happy birthday Julia! You deserve it. I do enjoy your posts. And ditto for your words of wisdom :)

Robyn Oliver said...

Happy 50th Birthday Julia, glad you let us know, it is a special one. I agree wholeheartedly with your approach to life; LITS: life is far too short. I had this idea that as you get older life would slow down WRONG!! at 60 my family is most important, keeping happy doing what I like best and don't waste a second doing stuff you don't enjoy (or do it as quick as you can). Live, Love and be Happy Hugs Robyn

Mary said...

Hoping your birthday was spectacular. From the photo, I would say it was. Loved reading all about you. I love your advice about making friends with yourself. I must say, the older I get the more I love spending time with me. You've learned lots in your 50 years. I'm heading toward 70, I love family and friends (sometimes in reverse order), I craft because I love it and I don't worry about dust. I just tell people not to touch the tables, cause I don't like marks! I love hearing the birds in the morning and watching the sun beams hitting the prisms I have hanging in the windows. Isn't life fun and by the way... you sure do make Wednesdays fun! Again...Happy Birthday!

Patsy Paterno said...

I love this assessment of yourself Julia! Sometimes I think I don't know very much about me, even if I'm approaching 60!!!! patsy

peggy aplSEEDS said...

Belated happy birthday, Julia! Blessings and hugs from the Philippines! peggy

Nikki C said...

HAPPY birthday Julia may you have had a wonderful bd hugs Nikki

Elizabeth said...

Brilliant post, Julia ... so much wisdom from one so young :) Having long past that particular milestone - and hurtling towards the big seven-oh far to fast for my liking - I can't disagree with a word of what you say. Wishing you a wonderful year ahead. Hugs, Elizabeth xx

Sylvia/LittleTreasures said...

I'm late for the party but I'll just bet you had a great time. Happy Year ahead. Putting things into prospective...I could be your mother ! I will have a 50 year class reunion this year, it's put me into an unbelievable frame of mind. Can't even imagine how the time has went so fast. Enjoy...

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