Friday, 24 August 2018

Life on the wonk

At the risk of boring you, I thought I'd make some more excuses for myself. Since 2016 when I had that brain tumour safely removed, my balance is shot, because all the ear tubes and stuff had to go to allow access. It gives me a seriously different perspective I can tell you. If I look in shop windows and keep walking, the perspective changes very quickly to being from the gutter. I simply cannot walk, look up and turn my head simultaneously without coming over all wonky, and at this age and this round-ness, it's not a good thing to be seen grabbing rails, staggering and erm,  very occasionally, plopping onto my butt! I do seem to have it down now,I know where to avoid - slopes, very damaged uneven surfaces, and building sites (which as a Joiner's apprentice I do actually get to stagger about now and then!). Generally though, two years on, you wouldn't know unless you watched closely. Or walked beside me. Ask Jan, she gets pushed into all sorts of gutters and buildings!

At workshops, amongst other things, my preamble contains an excuse for every single mount or embellishment being slightly wonky. I simply cannot get straight stuff straight any more. So it's definitely a 'do as I say not as I've done' with the sample cards!

I can't place something straight,and in this case I tried to use the camera to try to adjust and lo..even wonkier! Luckily the friends pictured all have a certain lean on them anyway, so I'm doing rather a good job of covering for them, don't you think! Do you know these people? That would be Doug Silverwolf, Lunch Lady Jan, Shaz Silverwolf and LLJ's wonderful Gordon. And WOYWW brought them together. You can meet them in LA at the Crop. And judge the lean for yourselves.

My wonderful in-laws. Who did not spend the wedding breakfast leaning gently to the left!
The funniest thing is corners and corridors. I can walk down a street in a reasonably straight line. But an enclosed corridor - not a chance. I just zig zag down it and pretend it's funny to be bouncing off walls and causing any hanging artwork to end up on the wonk too! Corners are weird;  I often end up going in a large arc, it definitely takes longer and I cannot explain the compulsion to walk the long way at all! I have this compulsion with sticking things on straight, I think. Or I am just no longer seeing straight! 
It's my new signature, so I've learned to like it or measure it. You can guess how often my craft works involve measuring....


12 comments:

Sue said...

Hi Julia, I love the way you joke about the balance problem. I get Vertigo, so can sympathise. I have often been walking the girls, feeling like I must look like I am drunk. I cannot see out of my right eye (it's an artificIal eye, so would be a miracle if I could:)), so that adds a but to the wobbliness when the Vertigo hits.

I have never been able to make things straight on cards and LOs, so I deliberately don't try any more.

Your LOs look fine to me:)

You take care and have a lovely weekend. Sue

Helen said...

I am chuckling... it's not really funny, (apart from our sick sense of humour) and I am sure (given how cruel/judgemental some people can be) you do get some funny looks.. Of course, putting it into perspective and considering the alternative, it is a small price to pay.. I applaud your attitude to the situation.

To the case in point, I would just deliberately craft off-centre anyway, then if it is deliberately wonky it won't look like you just can't place items straight. Although, sod's law you'll probably be 100% straight then!

Lunch Lady Jan said...

I'm big enough for you to bounce off every time! I do sympathise with the zig zagging, it happens to me because of the BPPV too. And I adore the LO of the Silverwolfs and Appletons, none of us are exactly upright anyway 😉
Hugs LLJ xxx

Bleubeard and Elizabeth said...

I applaud how you are able to find humor in this incredibly serious condition you have. You always take it on with grace (maybe not graceful, though) and aplomb. I e4njoyed both layouts and wonky is sometimes good. After all, people TRY for wonky and you get it without trying!

Christine said...

As you have, no doubt, read in my blog.... I have a wonky eye....and I stagger quite a lot!! I believe it's my lot in life to keep others on their toes. I can empathise with you completely, long may we test the strength of walls, drift to our own destinations, and have a good giggle to ourselves!!

Christine said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Shaz Brooks said...

Hi Julia, that layout & the comment made me laugh. A lot! Perhaps gin had been involved,( in fact if that pic is from where I think it is, there had DEFINITELY been gin involved) I find that a good excuse for pretty much any mishaps. :) Thanks to the nerve damage on my left leg side from my op, I tend to favour one side, I think I've forgotten how to stand straight. Good thing the nerve damage from the lung surgery is also on the left! Can you imagine the bottom half leaning one way, and the top half another? I know I avoid things like cobblestones these days, and one of these days I'm going to get brave enough to try my platforms out again. We have to keep our sense of humour, don't we?
When something comes out wonky, I blame the cardstock not being square, so add that to your repertoire. :) Love & hugs, and see you soon, Shaz XxX

Princess Judy Palmer said...

At least you have brain tumor surgery to blame. What about the rest of us?!!!! I go for a balance test in early September. It involves them gently whispering sweet nothings in my ear until I fall over. I think is how I understand it.

Anyhow, straightness is overrated and wonky is where it is at!

Kelly said...

You are still with us and still doing crafty goodness we love to see. Be wonky all you want. We're just glad to have you :-) Hugs!

Darnell said...

I'm so glad that nasty tumor was not located where your sense of humor is, Julia! I'm picturing you in a hotel corridor, zig-zagging along and doors being opened as you bounce by. You, hands in the air, throwing these words over your shoulder as you keep going, "Sorry. So sorry. Brain tumor, don't you know! Ta Ta!" Bless you!! Hugs, Darnell

ShazInOzCardsCalligraphy said...

Hugs Julia love the wonky outlook that has definitely given you a new perspective on life, you're a real encourager with your wonderful attitude. You enrich the lives of those around you. Great layouts and grand post.
Prayer hugs.. Shaz in Oz. X

Claire said...

I too live life on the wonk since the stroke... even after 11 years, so many things send me off balance - I simply have to concentrate on walking A to B with NO distractions!
I have simply given up trying to stick things straight in my journals! I am embracing the skew-whiff life! We wonky girls need to stick together :D xx